It’s never OK to date your friend’s ex, and this is why | Metro News
The news about Simon Cowell getting it on with his good friend's wife — or estranged wife, depending on who you talk to — has sparked a great debate once. If you've ever found yourself yearning for a friend's ex, you know that it's a precarious situation to navigate. All good friends like to believe in the. As for us mere mortals, my advice on dating a friend's ex would be handle I asked lots of friends what they thought about dating exes before.
Is it okay to lose a friend? Figure out if your decision is worth the drama that can and will unfold. If it's just infatuation, lust, or both, sweep it under the rug and pretend like it never happened. If it's real, listen to your heart and proceed to the next step. Break the news to your friend You need to let your friend know.
He has the right to know. There's no need to seek for his permission. Get straight to the point. Expect that this won't come easy for him. He might even try to punch you in the face.
But if he is really your friend, at some point he should be open to at least a conversation. Confess your feelings for her She is at the center of this and she might not even know it. Make sure you tell her exactly how you feel. Just talk to her and see what's up.
If she also likes you, then it may be time to court her. Give it some time Sure you like the world to know you've finally found your forever. But you might need to hold off on parading her at the parties you attend to. Your already-devastated friend will feel more miserable if he sees you together. But please go slow. Let your pal recover a little first before flaunting.
Has there been occasions awkwardness? Yes, but only at first, and not enough to matter. Neither of you are doing anything wrong. You are not a Bad Person.
Don't make it more uncomfortable for him than it needs to be. Reader, I married her. Also, the whole idea of a "town bike" is rooted in misogyny, as I'm sure you know. Obviously those cultural tropes are powerful, but you don't have to let them keep you from pursuing something that could be great. If it turns into something, you could always mention it to your ex, but it's not mandatory.
Or more of an acquaintance? Friends are more touchy - acquaintances are fair game, particularly if he broke up with you. That being said dudes are weird. Despite him breaking up with you it wouldn't be unheard of for ex to maybe act a bit wonky if you start hanging out with new guy - thats his problem however, not yours.
People tend to date those they know When you think about it, it's pretty obvious that this would happen a lot. It's sad, but one of the things we have to learn to deal with in life is the possible pain of seeing a past partner with someone else we know. It's happened to me and it's happened to pretty much everyone I know. If you are into this guy and he's into you it'd be needlessly self-denying not to pursue it. Go for it, and good luck! Maybe a little weirdness initially, despite general good feelings about the ex, but it all worked out well in the end.
I don't see anything wrong with dating the friend of an ex though. There are likely mutual interests and really an ex, while it's nice of you to be considerate, is an ex nonetheless. It's no more his concern who you date going forward than it is your concern who he dates going forward. As a side note, why isn't your default assumption that the new guy would start turning out to support you in the things you are doing? The problem in this question seems to be to only partly be about the men's friendship, and sounds to a significant extent also to be about how you are envisioning your role relative to them.
I doubt you are actually thinking of yourself in those terms at all, but the repeated use of such passive language really jumped out at me in your question, and is problematic in a way that dating a friend of an ex will never be. You do not need to run it by your ex first. Your new guy probably does though.
I mean, that's the guy code; you don't date your friend's sisters or exes. So if he is going to break that rule, he needs to run it by the friend first: Are you cool if I go out with her? So just be prepared for that possibility.
See all the folks in the comments who married friends of exes? I did it too.
The Rules For Dating Your Friend’s Ex-Girlfriend
Must be a Thing. We date the people we know. Mr Tuesday had a convo like that with my ex. It's not about ownership, it is about making sure there isn't awkwardness. So you should go for it!
Etiquette of dating/banging a good friend's ex-gf? - depanama.info Forums
So, for most potential dating partners out there, I would just not be willing to risk it. It's possible the man you're having sparks with feels the same way, in which case you should respect that and not pursue. But if you feel good about it, and he feels good about it, I would say go for it!