ENFP Relationships | 16Personalities
ENFPs take their relationships very seriously, but also approach them with a childlike enthusiasm and energy. They seek and demand authenticity and depth in. Here's a guide to finding strong ENFP relationships according to Myers-Briggs. When it comes to dating and relationships, we all want to find. An ENFP relationship can be the best thing to ever happen to you—or to know what a dating an ENFP really means for you and your partner.
The Curious Dating Obstacles of an ENFP
She values her relationships, and that means she values you! Be aware that you likely cannot change this aspect of who she is.
Not everyone understands the liveliness of your personality. Some may misunderstand your interactions. Everything else will fall into place. I remember an evening in my early twenties. I was in my apartment that I shared with five roommates. Yes, you read that right. And I loved it! We had some friends from our apartment complex over, and being a Jenny-like ENFP, I got into a deep conversation with a lanky physics major. He was nice, sure. But there was nothing resembling sparks on my part. Surely, such an exuberant display meant instant attraction.
Physics Man came around a few times after that. I always enjoyed my conversations with him, but never felt anything more. Thankfully, I had a good opportunity to explain my feelings to him and he seemed a good sport, though I never saw him again.
It can seemingly come out of nowhere. Given that most ENFPs love the romantic notion of living life by your heart rather than your logic, this sensation is not totally unwelcome. Caution from friends and family may fall on what seems like deaf ears. Jenny wants to listen to you, but she also is strongly guided by her heart.
Practice some restraint and allow a relationship to grow piece by piece. With some practice, this can become a great way to build a healthy relationship with more memories to cherish. This type thrives on exploring new ideas and appreciates anyone who can intelligently challenge the way they think. A good debate is a good first date. The more ideas you bring to the table, the sexier you become to an ENFP.
Seduction, for this type, begins in the mind. ENFPs have an all-or-nothing personality, which is why they are drawn to the grounded presence of introverted, intuitive judgers. Much like children, their excitable natures are comforted by meaningful, structured thought.
Keep an open mind. The sooner you accept this, the easier things are going to be. Take all of this in stride. ENFPs move a mile a minute but it can be a lot of fun to move along with them. Just make sure that you are open to exploring new topics, new activities and new positions.
Stand your ground when it matters. ENFPs are as stubborn as they are open-minded. They fiercely defend the values that matter to them and respect others who do the same. ENFPs thrive on communication. For example, an overly enthusiastic ENFP may plan an elaborate surprise party for their introverted partner, who may in turn feel quite stressed by the event.
How to Date an ENFP
ENFPs are sensitive to direct criticism but value the health of their relationship. If they are doing something wrong, they want to know.
Make them feel free. There is nothing an ENFP loathes more than the feeling of being tied down. A healthy relationship, to an ENFP, means that both parties are growing and evolving alongside each other but neither remains stagnant. Get ready for some really strange whims. But sit with them while they Google the plane tickets anyway. This is everything you need to know before entering into an ENFP relationship.
We are naturally enthusiastic and curious. We are fascinated by so many things. We are also easily amused. How to love this part of us: Engage us in new thoughts or ideas. We like to take care of others, but struggle to be taken care of ourselves. But please do it anyway. We are seekers of people. We feel fulfilled when the people in our daily lives are happy and we try to find ways that we can add to that.
The truth is though, we are often on the giving end of those things. Sometimes we need to be taken care of, but we will never ask you to do it. We hate asking for help. This can end up being a really lonely place for ENFPs to be.
Few things make me feel more special than knowing when someone is thinking of me or goes out of their way to help me or check in on me. Make it a point to make contact with us. Texts, small handwritten notes, or unexpected pop-ins although not always welcomed at home are all acceptable forms of checking in on us.
How did we arrive at this? Let your bending in the archer's hand be for gladness; For even as He loves the arrow that flies, so He loves also the bow that is stable. There's a bit of grown-up kid in every ENFP, so they get a lot of fun and enjoyment from playing with their children. However, they consider it essential to pass their strongly-held values and beliefs down to their children, and will strive consistently to create a positive, ideal environment for their children's growth.
The ENFP may exhibit an inconsistency in their roles with their children. At one moment, they might be their child's best friend, laughing and whooping it up, and in the next moment they may appear the stern authoritarian.
This inconsistency seems to be a result of a conflict between the ENFP's genuine desire to relate to their children on the children's level, and their compulsion to follow their deeply-felt value system. In other words, the ENFP wants to be their child's friend, but if a value is violated, they will revert to the parental role to make sure their children understand the violation. This inconsistency may be confusing and frustrating for the children. They usually value their children as individuals, allowing them room for growth.
The ENFP's enthusiasm and affection may at times seem smothering to their children. This will be especially true for children with strong Thinking or Sensing preferences, who will have a difficult time understanding the effervescence of the ENFP, and will feel at times embarassed by the ENFP's enthusiasm and tendency to display their affection publicly.
The ENFP is able to take care of day-to-day necessities, such as picking children up at the correct times, getting them to softball practice, getting them fed, etc. However, it is a chore for the ENFP and is not a natural strength. The ENFP also has a difficult time disciplining their children, unless a very strongly-held value has been violated. The rich imagination and creativity of the ENFP parent creates a fun, dynamic and exciting environment for kids.
The ENFP's strong value system turns experiences into meaningful lessons for their children. The ENFP parent is valued by their children for their warm, affirming natures, and their fun-loving approach to living.
They are energetic and fun to be with. They are very affirming, and get great satisfaction from supporting and lifting up others. They are idealists who seek authenticity in their personal relationships. ENFPs are valued by their peers and confidantes as warm, supportive, giving people. In the workplace or other casual relationship environments, the ENFP is likely to get along well with almost all other types of people.
ENFPs are genuinely interested in people, and are highly perceptive about them, to the point where they're able to understand and relate to all of the personality types with relative ease.